bad behavior is rewarded
my worldview can be light-hearted and naive to a fault, which often doesn't end the best in a world where goodwill isn't encouraged. as there's no reason to be cruel towards others, i interact with people in a positive manner. i've also believed people will follow the principle of treating someone kindly if that person has done the same. to me, it's natural: why be hostile to someone who hasn't done anything to you?
however, i recently realized that this isn't the case. in hindsight, the way others have treated me before should've made this obvious, but the fact may have not registered to me because of how illogical it was. sadly, people fall victim easily to all kinds of evil, even where it isn't appropriate or is disproportionate. i may not be christian, but the seven deadly sins are an apt description of society's ills.
despite my distrust in others and signs i see that a person might not be the most trustworthy, i tend to have full or some trust in people's ability to have good principles toward me (even if they aren't to others) when i haven't significantly wronged them to warrant it. it's 'disillusioning'—in a partially depressing and frustrating way—when i turn out to be wrong, because i hadn't fully expected or was choosing not to expect it from them. it makes me think back to the person's past behaviors and wonder "why'd i somehow not anticipate that would happen to me/that i'd also eventually be hurt or betrayed? why'd i ignore my better judgement?"
i recently spoke with someone about their negative experiences with several ex-friends, and all of them disregarded any regard for the said someone's feelings to only think of what benefits themselves. i was already aware that being inclined to selfishness is part of being human, but i hadn't expected that level of carelessness. hearing about and experiencing what it's like to be around these sorts of people has somewhat broken my worldview.
if people aren't interested in doing the right thing and taking others into consideration, what's the point in me feeling guilty about anything? why is it that people who act bad don't receive consequences, but people who do their best not to are punished regardless of what they do? that line of questioning sounds like it might come from an incel on r/niceguy, but it's true; i've always wanted to believe that the world enacted justice in its' own way to support those who don't receive it, but i only see the opposite happen.
it's been hard to accept that there's no reasoning with the world, because i can only find satisfaction when i know the most logical or "correct" outcome has been achieved. the reality is that the world doesn't operate on any standard, and it especially wouldn't operate on the opinions of mortals. in response to this, you could ask why it isn't possible that the world has a standard of unfairness rather than fairness.
to answer that question: it is true that the world is a "survival of the fittest," but this isn't something inherent about how the world functions. the reason why selfish people are continuously favored is because the more selfish you are, the farther you're willing to go to get what you'd want, no matter the cost. when you're selfish, you aren't bound by social obligations or ethical standards. you have fewer moral inhibitions, and it allows you to exploit every available opportunity you can benefit from.
less selfish people in contrast impose constraints on themselves that limit their tactics to what's "fair" or "right." when you have less ways to move, it's no surprise that these people would be at a disadvantage. it can then be expected that the road of selflessness is one paved with hardship, but people shouldn't choose to be amoral nor should they choose to endlessly suffer. like in any situation, moderation is always the win-win outcome; while i think the phrase is cringe, "do no harm but take no shit" is a good explanation of the correct way to live life. you should strive to be moral, but that shouldn't mean surrendering in the face of immorality. i think the tolerance paradox spoke of dis...
for that reason, the correct route would be to go against my better judgement if it means having faith that things will be different⎯it's not like i could stop if i tried, i normally give the benefit of the doubt when my gut tells me i should question someone's trustworthiness⎯but to also get better at not letting others get away with it when it turns out things aren't different. there's a good chance this'll never happen given that i have trouble standing up for myself, but it's something at least worth looking forward to.